"You're my inspiration"

As all of you know, Kevin and I are on a weight loss journey. Not a DIET, but a lifestyle change to make us happier and healthier people. We have both been experiencing success (him at 25lbs, me at 15...weigh in day tomorrow, so probably more). I'm thrilled to death, as I've said before, this is the first time I've been READY to lose weight. I don't have nearly the cravings I've had before, I don't cheat in secret, and I have my support group to help me along. Also, my support group also leans on me for answers to questions. I love this. I've always felt that as a health care professional, I need to take care of myself, and finally I am. I love it when my friends come to me for answers about exercise or weight loss. If my knowledge can help them on their journey, I feel like I am helping them.

But that isn't what this blog is about. I just want to say that I'm becoming annoyed at people telling me "I'm their inspiration". This happens a lot at work "Oh, Summer, you're doing so well, I'm going to use you as my inspiration to lose 5 lbs" or whatever. Now, I'm glad everyone at work is noticing and supporting me in this journey, but I have a news flash. If you aren't ready, it isn't going to happen. Nobody is my "inspiration". Sure, having friends and family doing this along with me helps, but them telling me not to eat McDonald's, or seeing them not eat it, is not going to make me do it. I'm doing it for myself, and so should everyone else.

Also, I've realized it is silly to use me as an inspiration, because I'm not DOING anything. That is the difference. It isn't that I have some magic weight loss secret that I'm hiding and need to share. It is simply the things that I am no longer doing.

I don't eat the crap that patients bring in.
I don't eat the birthday cakes we have several times a month.
I don't go out to eat.
I don't eat the potluck food.

It isn't anything that I'm DOING, per say, it is the things I'm NOT doing. I didn't eat BAD before, in my 3 squares a day. It was all the other shit that I DID. I mean, sure, I made some poor choices (i.e. McD's), but my main issue was these things that I am no longer doing.

I guess I just don't feel like I'm doing anything inspiration-worthy. I don't particularly like the attention being placed on my weight loss, since I still have so far to go, and I don't like having the pressure of knowing everyone is watching me. I mean, I've only gone over calories once in 2 months, so I'm good with that, but if I burn 500 calories in my Body Pump Tuesday morning, I might have a half a cupcake that day at work, I don't want the pressure of feeling like I can't have it because people are watching me. If I have the calories to eat it, I'm going to eat it. If I deprive myself, then my craving will become an obsession, and off the wagon I go. And in two weeks when Kevin and I go to Disneyland for our 1 year anniversary, we have already decided that it is a cheat weekend. We know we're going to gain, we know we're going to eat like crap, but I need that every once in awhile. Because I love food. And I can eat good for me food 98% of the time, but every once in awhile, I want shit food. And it isn't all going to be shit food either, we're having two pretty fancy dinners, and I want t be able to enjoy fancy (expensive) food without feeling guilty. And we're gonna do it. Then I'm doing an 11 day cleanse as soon as we get back to get me back on track, but I'm going to enjoy every calorie I eat while we're on vacation.

Moral of the story? I'm happy to be part of your support group, I'm happy to answer your questions, I'm happy to be brutally honest with you. I'm not happy to have the pressure of being your inspiration. Being my own is hard enough.

Blog for Dogs...DO It!!!

How often have you had a chance to have a 20 pound bag of dog food donated to a shelter simply for writing a blog post? It’s really that easy. Pedigree has upped the ante big time. And please spread this message: The food drive is not limited to pet blogs. Imagine if we could spread this message beyond our circles and see how far it goes? The numbers could be substantial. Here is the full scoop:

* Each year, more than 4 million dogs end up in shelters and breed rescue organizations. Pedigree created The PEDIGREE Adoption Drive to help shine a spotlight on the plight of these homeless dogs.

* This year the PEDIGREE Adoption Drive is raising awareness for homeless dogs by donating a bowl of food to shelter dogs for everyone who becomes a “Fan” or “Likes” The PEDIGREE Adoption Drive on Facebook. So far more than 1 million bowls have been donated.

* Special for BlogPaws West: For each blog that posts about the PEDIGREE® Adoption Drive through September 19th, PEDIGREE® will donate a bag of their new Healthy Longevity Food for Dogs to shelters nationwide. It’s simple: Write a post, help a dog.




* Thursday, September 16 through Sunday, September 19, the Pedigree BlogPaws bloggers will host a Blog Hop, to help raise awareness for the “Write a post, help a dog” effort.

Interview with a Vampire

Anne Rice

This book was suggested by Andy. Kevin voiced his opinion that it was hard to follow and he didn't enjoy it before I began.

I didn't find it that hard to read. Sure, there were points going back to "present" day where Luis talked with the boy that was interviewing him, but Anne Rice was pretty clear about pointing that out in the first line of those exchanges.

That being said, I didn't LOVE this book. I think my problem is I have two other "vampire" series that I read, and lore is different in all of them, and I don't like that. I didn't like that vampires have a heartbeat, or that they kill every person they feed from, or that there is no "society" for vampires. I also found the second half of the book to be much more confusing that the first. The descriptions while Luis was in Paris, the Theater des Vampires, and Armand became confusing for me. Too much dialogue about what vampires are, and aren't.

I think this book just fell short for me because I've read other vampire stories that I enjoyed much more. I'm glad I read it, I can check it off the list of "books I should read".

Now, on to Song of Solomon. I think I'm gonna have a hard time with this one. Already about 40 pages in and not "into" it yet.

Mammoth

Here are some of the photos from our camping trip this weekend in Convict Lake!

Odd Thomas

Dean Koontz
Given to me by Melissa Griffin.

I've never read Dean Koontz before. I knwo, that seems amazing, since he is EVERYWHERE. My friend in high school was addicted. Kev has all of the Odd Thomas books. Just wasn't interested. Now, on my nook, it said this book was 340 pages. Space was 622. Space took me a little over a month, this took me a day and a half.

It was excellent. Funny, exciting, scary, suspenseful, touching. I was truly surprised at the end, it almost made me cry, and I finished it wanting to know about what Odd Thomas would do next. That is the mark of a good book. The only bad thing? I have 16 other books to read before I canr ead whatever I want. Now, that is not entirely true, I have put some of my books in the mix too, so I'm telling myself I need to ge through two more of my list books before reading Forever Odd. Though if it only takes me a day and a half, it isn't like it takes me away from much other reading!!

So far, this is my favorite book of the four I have read so far. The most "me" book. I have enjoyed all of them, in their own way, but so far this si the one I will read again.

On to Interview with a Vampire. Started it last night, just a few pages in, enjoying so far. Onward!!

Books

Just FYI, here is my list of books. Italics I have finished, bold I'm currently working on. Next to the author is the person who recommended, and the format of the book I have (or don't...)

Books
1. The Talisman – Stephen King – Kev (ebook downloaded)
2. How I Became Stupid – Martin Page – Doug (ebook)
3. Song of Solomon – Toni Morrison – Jodie (ebook)
4. Needful Things – Stephen King – Mike (ebook)
5. The Shack – William P. Young – Crystal (ebook)
6. Odd Thomas – Dean Koontz – Mel G (ebook)
7. The Giver – Lois Lowry – Bryan (ebook)
8. Interview with the Vampire – Ann Rice – Andy (paperback)
9. Space – James Michener – Skip (do not have)
10. Invisible Monsters – Chuck Palahniuk - Jen (do not have)
11. The Friday Night Knitting Club – Kate Jacobs – Stacey (ebook)
12. From a Buick 8 – Stephen King – Kat (ebook)
13. Blink! – Malcom Gladwell – Mom (ebook)
14. The Origin of the Species – Charles Darwin – Leslie (ebook downloaded)
15. Book of John from the Bible – Bible- Diana (ebook)
16. Life of Pi – Yann Martel – Angela (ebook)
17. The Wednesday Letters – Jason F. Wright – Cyndi (do not have)
18. Warriors Don’t Cry – Melba Patillo Beals – Meghan (do not have)
19. Freakonomics – Steven Levitt – Brendon (ebook)
20. The Wedding – Nicholas Sparks – Luis (ebook)

Space

by James Michener, 1982

This book was recommended to me by Skip. It, again, is a book I would NEVER pick up on my own, which is the purpose.

Apparently, all of his books start far from where they end. This book started in 1944, during World War 2. It chronicles the life of several men whose lives are intertwined through their work in space, and that field. It was a really, really good book. It also took me a really, really long time.Especially for a mere 622 pages. It wasn't that it was hard to get through, or boring, there was just a LOT of information on every page. The thing I really enjoyed about this book was how Michener intertwines history with fiction. As someone who is familiar, but not nearly and expert, on our space program, it was very interesting figuring out what was real, and what was fictional. He does a very good job mixing the two together so it all is believable. The characters are all likable, no real villain in the book.
All in all, this is a fabulous book. Doing some research on the specifics for this post I found out there was a 13 part miniseries aired in 1985. I would like to find that.
Someday, I make pick up another Michener book, it would be a good book to be reading while you're also reading something else. Be the "brain" read while also reading a fluff book.

Now, on to Odd Thomas. About 100 pages in to it already, and loving it.